Warning: The Scariest Support Blog You’ll Ever Read

With Halloween around the corner, we thought we would take a look at some of the most frightening monsters you may come across in the world of customer support. Maybe you’ve encountered them before. Maybe (gasp!) you’ve been one before. 

Don’t be a customer support monster. 

The Zombie

This horrifying being looks vaguely human, but don’t let that act fool you. When the Zombie is on the phone with a customer, it acts as though its mind is a million miles way. Clearly bored or preoccupied, the Zombie customer service agent instills fear in the customer, who wonders if they are really being heard or if they’re just talking to the undead. 

The Vampire

Unlike vampires in the movies, the customer support Vampire gives its victims a slow, painful death by sucking the very life force out of customers. The usual method of attack is by ignoring what the customer has already told them and asking the customer a ton of scripted questions that are not relevant or which have already been answered. Often attempting to disguise the attack as troubleshooting, the vampire goes for the jugular vein every time it repeatedly asks “Are you sure the device is plugged in?” 

The Ghost

This creepy little apparition is particularly fond of Live Chat. Like Casper The Friendly Ghost, all is fine and happy until suddenly, the Ghost disappears and the customer is left staring at the Live Chat window, wondering if the Ghost will ever reappear. 

The Evil Clown

The Evil Clown is smiling, but there is something frightening in his eyes. Often found in Tier 2 support or higher, the Evil Clown provides answers to more lowly beings, but his answers are laced with sarcasm. The Evil Clown thinks that the customer has a stupid question, that Tier 1 support should know the answer, and above all, that in no way should anyone ever question what he says. 

Ok, we’re just having fun here. If your company has made smart hires and trained agents thoroughly, your customer should never have to fear encountering the customer support monsters. However, your customer support agents may have fears of their own when they end up on the phone with some of these customer monsters. 

The Werewolf

This customer is so nice, so friendly, so very normal. He is always a pleasure to deal with…except when he suddenly goes ballistic over some seemingly minor issue. It’s a rare occurrence, but when it happens, there is much shock and awe among the support team. 

The Witch

The Witch (and her male counterpart, the Warlock) is well-known in customer support circles. This terrifying woman seems to live to make customer support agents miserable. Not only does she complain about every. single. thing., but she also likes to make threats about taking things to upper management. One of her favorite games is called “I’m going to get Legal involved.”  Agents fear her calls. Sometimes a brave, young CSA will make a stand against the Witch. The one time they do so is usually the last time. 

With Tracker Suite There are No Tricks, Just Treats

If you run across any werewolves or witches, the best way to get rid of them is to quickly solve their issues and close their tickets. Tracker Suite is your best bet for avoiding scary support scenarios. Ask for your demo today!



Scroll to Top